THE LETTER "S" OR "A" (PART III)

I would not say my friendship with Annabelle was close knit though she said it so many times. She do not have any real friends. Though we spent many hours together, it felt more like am just her listener. Many times i like to call it quits but she seems suicidal. Annabelle's negative attitude towards the whole world and herself is really depressing and pathetic.

Sometimes i wonder if she is putting on a show or is it real? However, I concluded my findings , am sure she is a Drama Queen. Maybe she has histrionic personality disorder too. She can cry anytime of the day for any reason at any place. She has no dignity and self respect. She can drive to Lucas house and making her presence felt by crying in her car. Parked at the entrance of his house. She does not care if Lucas's mother and brother has low opinions of her. She does not care as long as she gets Lucas's attention. Annabelle would drive all over the city looking for Lucas's vehicle, parked next to his car, waited till he came and spotted her. All she ever wanted is attention. What is so great about dignity and self respect to her?

Annabelle can do horrible things yet has no feelings of guilt or shame. Some of the stories she boasted to me are unexpected terrible doings of hers. I felt sorry for her victims. Never thought I would one day be one of her victims. Annabelle is stubborn like a bull or maybe a donkey, egoistic like a lion. She has anger issues. She has nothing good , only the worst, to say about anyone else including Lucas. In fact , Lucas got the worst remarks from her. Yet she could not get enough of him. She could not let go. Why? She claimed she does not love him anymore. She allows her ego to lead her. She could not let go due to her egoistic ways. She is just not the type of woman to accept being neglected or ignored. After all, in her mind, She is perfect and flawless.

If it is love that Annabelle has for Lucas, would she display herself as single and available in pubs, bistros and karaoke so men would woo her and bring her to bed? Easier to woo her than to break off with her. I don't think any of her generous men has ever managed to get out from her life. Annabelle will find ways to lie her way back into their lives and always a dame in distress waiting for her hero to save.

Men she chose are generous and humorous and preferably not high in IQ like Lucas. Makes it easier for her to be in control.  The best are those who has the time to chat with her whole day long.  She is really into those who agree with everything she says. She projected herself as a "good gal" in these places. People who dislike her label her as "Like a Virgin"??.. She ordered green tea. She is extremely shy when men approached her. She would lower her head , eyes looking up, flashing her fake eye lashes when men approached her. The men can talk whole night while she responded with flashing those fake eye lashes of hers. Its quite a scene watching her portray as a helpless dame and letting those men think they are leading while in fact, they are already trapped and hooked by her.

I guessed Annabelle is right, she does not love Lucas. Annabelle just enjoy the feel of possessing him and displaying him in public places and social network as hers. Annabelle is doing such so Lucas's other female friends can see for themselves that Lucas belong to her. She also wants to show the whole world Lucas mistreat her, not giving her the love she deserves.

As if FB is not good enough, Annabelle would not mind harassing women who contacts Lucas. When all that she had done is not enough to control him , Annabelle chose to physically abuse Lucas. I was shocked to learn of her anger management issues. Apparently her ways of clawing, beating , hitting, scratching her men are her ways of "taming" her men (pets). Annabelle abused all the men she dated except for Daniel. Her favorite part is taking a knife from the kitchen and go after them. 

Which is worst? Would you prefer the physical abuse or having all your clothes shredded to pieces? I guess for Lucas , all her reactions are proof of love. Her stalking, harassing his female friends, shredding all his work shirts to pieces, verbal and physical abuse are still acceptable. After all , Annabelle told him that I taught her all these to break them up. I am her Mastermind. For the record, I do not believe Evil can be taught. 

I can never understand why she has problems letting go since she has been sleeping around behind Lucas's back. During their courtship and during their break up period. This has been her lifestyle even before she met Lucas. She would have affairs with few men at the same time. She would be in one relationship that benefit her in monetary terms and at the same time, has other affairs. I guessed this way she would not feel neglected or unwanted and getting a fat bank account. She has no trouble asking for gifts. She is anything but shy. Annabelle broke off with Daniel after three months because she could not get a cent out of him. Daniel is a soft spoken well mannered businessman. He comes from a loving and well to do family. Definitely a mismatch from the beginning. Daniel has problem trusting her as he was told Annabelle is dating others behind his backs. After twice of getting cheated by Annabelle, Daniel jilted her. He is the only guy who never too keen to keep in touch with her. The lucky one that got away. On that day, Annabelle was dump by Daniel and Teddy. As such, she went back to Lucas, forgetting all the negative remarks she ever made about him. Lucas will always be the one she turn to when she is sad. Lucas is easily influenced by her. Annabelle can lie through her teeth and Lucas will still believe her. To the point that he was the one who gave her STD.

Annabelle boasted how she got her man, Teddy, from hometown to buy her an iphone 4S and the same time made Lucas agree to buy her one too. Lucas does not have enough money to get her the iPhone 4S so she told him that she will get the iphone 4S on her own first. Lucas will need to pay her back. As collateral she took his passport, a gold necklace and a gold ring which was a gift from Lucas's former girlfriend, all without his knowledge. After 2 years, the passport is still with Annabelle. Stealing and stalking are one of her many talents.

Her famous quotes are "why cant any men love me? all i want is love but all they want is sex.. is that so difficult?".."as long as a man is willing to spent on woman, that is love"..  due to her insecurity she labeled everyone that she know (including me) "Eat Shit Dog" (direct translation from local dialect of hokkien) It means a hopeless human being who never learn or improve his or her ways... "That girl cannot be trusted. She is a liar".. "That friend is not my true friend. She betrayed me. She was not there to help me" ... "Pig Dog Friend" (direct translation from local dialect of hokkien. It rhyme better in hokkien) , means her friend that is in the animal category, of no value to her ..

Its obvious nobody's perfect Except Annabelle.

THE LETTER "S" OR "A" (PART II)

Annabelle did very well in her sales considering no training has been provided. She has the ability to make others believe she is the right source in the beauty line. She is the type who does not practise what she preached.

After 2 months in sales, Annabelle went MIA (missing in action).

Annabelle called me one day to place some orders and I later learnt that her MIA is due to her rocky love affair with Lucas. The usual issues of relationship when there is no trust the other party will feel suffocated. It is from there our business relationship turn to friendship.

Annabell shared her stories of Lucas being unfaithful to her. Lucas has not been honest when he deny having constant contact with his ex girlfriend and another girl who had recently broken off with her boyfriend. However smart Lucas think he is, he is not able to hide anything from Annabelle. Lucas is a simple minded guy and always underestimating Annabelle's intelligence. Annabelle has the means and ways to check his itemised phone bills. This is where we all should learn never to leave our phone. 

Alot can be done when you combine phone + laptop.

I later advised Annabelle to have some confident in her relationship since no one will be happy when there is always some doubts. She decided to stop everything she is doing in order to follow Lucas where ever he goes. Even during working hours. This way she will know who he is in contact with.

Not long after, both Annabelle and Lucas decided to go their separate ways. It was she who had a hard time letting go of Lucas. She could not function as normal without the knowledge of his whereabouts and situations. She would think of him with the other women. She cried till her eyes puffy and swollen everyday. She was in a mess.

My mistake was i took pity in her and being there for her. The "being there for her" session grew longer. From a call to a tea break and from there to a whole day spent with her. Soon it was clubbing from 10pm to 3 am. Though it is not my lifestyle but knowing her needs to gain attention so to temporary forget Lucas, I bear with her . It is time consuming and definitely not cost effective.  At one point it also felt like privacy being invaded or worst, life threatening for me. She seems to be living in her own world. There are only her and herself. Only she is important. Only she is always right. Only she is attractive. Only she is perfect. Yet, why is she always complaining about not being happy? Why is she in pain from feeling lonely? She cries everyday, like a crocodile crying.

It is from this day, I realize Annabelle has the heart made of steel and painted in dark shades. Reality struck me hard when i lay motionless and helplessly on a table with grobbing hands all over while she watched , laughed and goes on with her singing. I was shocked to learn my mind is working just fine but my body somehow has betrayed me by staying motionless. I wanted to yell for help. No words came out. I prayed hard someone can understand what i am trying to say through my eyes. Can they see I am helpless , can they see I need someone to get the fat old man's off me? I prayed hard. Prayed like i never prayed before. Then the moment of truth came to me, Annabelle came up to me and told me she has decided to ask the fat old man to send me home as she is not done having her fun with her friends and she would like to continue her singing. My heart crashed. It was like she has dropped me as if i am a hot brick.

This resulting in months spent listening to her constant complaints and accusation of Lucas. She wanted to have a new start without him in her life. I believed her, not knowing she had contacted Lucas.

Their reconciliation was made known to all after couple of months later. Everyone was delighted with the news. My only advise to Annabelle was "you chose this path , only you can finish it. Noone can walk it for you".

THE LETTER "S" OR "A" (PART I)

The last straw that broke the camel's back. This is best to describe what prompt me to write this story. Against all odds and against my personal protocol i have decided to write this to clear my name (among many others) and help others to avoid such situations. This is my blog and best thing about it is i can write whatever I want. To protect everyone's privacy, names has been changed.
                      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kenny called and would like me to meet some friends of his. Kenny is a very popular and funny guy though he has the habit of owing his friends' money and loving any women who cross his path. He was once ago a businessman doing quite well in used car dealership. Due to bad decisions making, he landed in tons of debts and from then on, his wife is the one wearing the "pants" in the house. Sad but true. Imagine a cow with nose ring. He does resembles the cow, no doubt about it, due to his body size and frame. He is also well known for his huge fleshy nose. And I thought Jacky Chan's nose is big.

I got to know two women and a guy on that fateful day. The women; Annabelle is in her 20s and Sandy in her 30s. Both women are sisters and dressed casually with medium to large Louie Vuitton bags.  It was obvious the guy, Lucas is Annabelle's lover. Lucas , however are looking smart in his casual wear. Annabelle seems to be speaking on his behalf most of the time. With watchful eyes like the hawk, she would watch his every move. A slight movement from him, her head is turn to him. A very possessive woman, I presumed. Lucas seems to be enjoying her insecurity and attention. Sandy seems to be more stable and mature. She is careful with her words and protective of her younger sister.  She wants to make sure her sis is on the right path and will always be there to guide her.

During this time, I understand the women came from a small town, and are now residing in the city. Apparently Sandy is married to a local city guy. According to Kenny, she is married to a very wealthy man. However, I have never heard of this wealthy man before. Must be a low profile gentleman who does not like socializing much. The rich and wealthy in the city hang out together. The saying goes "birds of a feather flock together"?

Annabelle has since moved to the city and has no future plans of going back to her hometown. She said she is the outgoing type. Being single and young with hot blood rushing up and down in her blood veins, she is no stranger hanging out in Karaoke every night or spending hours on pool games daily. Annabelle boasts of her acquaintance with the rich and wealthy men and the girls she clubs with.

We all decided to give it a try on business cooperation between Annabelle and me. Both sisters will try out the products under my company and Annabelle will be appointed as one of the distributor in the city.


The deal has been sealed and signed for.

THREE'S A CROWD

The phrase Three's a Crowd is very often used when referring to relationships, bffs or ...... ?? 

However, is it not every men's dreams to have threesome in bed? Seems this is now commonly practice in a smaller town near to where i am staying (neighbor). And they are in their 40s... so much excitement in their lives and so daring to try (being in a small town where news can spread like wildfire if a fly can fart) or maybe the women have done it many times ?? It is after all the girlfriend who introduce the other woman to him and suggested on threesome... Gosh ! was that man happy as hell to have such a generous and exciting girlfriend.. is this girlfriend for keeps or what??

Some women I do not understand.. and cant understand even if i try.. 

Both Husband and Wife has a mutual friend (woman) and is actually Wife's bff.  One fine day, the Husband asked the Wife to introduce BFF to him for sexual needs. BFF agreed and WIFE drove BFF to the hotel to meet HUSBAND!! The husband told his wife not to wait up for them, he will call her to pick them up once they are done. (A well trained wife this one). 

True enough the husband called the wife after they are done and they all went for food together. 

Husband must be very good because BFF told her best friend the sex was great and he is huge!!

A Meaningful Story

A boy was born to a couple after eleven years of marriage.

The boy was the gem to this loving couple..

One morning the husband saw a bottle of medicine on the table. Being late for
office he could only asked
his wife to keep it in the cupboard.

His wife, preoccupied in the kitchen totally forgot the matter.



The boy saw the bottle, fascinated by its colour and drank it all.

Such huge dosages turned fatal to the child. He collapsed. The mother

hurried him to the hospital. He died.

The mother was stunned. She was terrified how she was going to face her
husband.


When the distraught father came to the hospital and saw the dead

child, he looked at his wife and uttered just five words.





QUESTIONS :



1. What were the five words ?

2. What is the implication of this story?



Scroll down to read.............











ANSWER :



The husband just said "I am with you Darling".

The husband's totally unexpected reaction is a proactive behavior.

The child is dead. There is no point in finding fault with the mother.

Besides, if only he had taken time to keep the bottle away, this would

not have happened.



No one is to be blamed. She had also lost her only child. What she

needed at that moment was consolation and sympathy from the husband.

That is what he gave her.



If everyone can look at life with this kind of perspective, there would be
much fewer problems in the
world.



"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."

Take off all your envies, jealousies, selfishness, and fears.

And you will find things are actually not as difficult as you think.

YOUNGER GENERATION

I had recently interviewed afew and came across youngsters who are living a very comfy lifestyle compared to the past generations. They started having their own cars when they reached teen age, started dating at very young age, no curfews for them, able to buy or treat friends for drinks maybe a way to show their generosity or maturity or independancy or.... ?? They spent alot, because they were not taught the value of money. They possessed expensive mobile phones even though they are unemployed. Money seems to "rain" upon them very easily. Some of these kids dont even come from well off families. Where do they find the money to enjoy such carefree lifestyle? Late nights, datings , treating friends for meals & drinks, own transports.... What will become of our next generation? They dont even know some have to work a whole month for RM500 of pay. This amount of money can only last these over pampered kids for two weeks or the most three. They are mostly in the 20s category.

These kids are very good in maths. Tell them to work a month for RM500, after much consideration, they think its not worth their time. They dont care or dont want to work their way up the corporate ladder. They just want to jump out from a plane and land on top the corporate ladder!!.. How long do you think they can survive on the Directors' seat or CEO position? Ok, .. Manager's position... Do you think they know what makes a good leader? Do you think they know what is "managing a profitable business"...? Or better still, Do you think they know how to earn money? They are not getting enough exposure to lead a team or manage a company. Honestly, I think they dont know how to take care of themselves.

Alot of youngsters nowadays chose to be in the sales industry. Be it any sales. Whatever the company is selling as long as they are a SALESMAN!!! Why?? Simply for the freedom. They dont have to be stucked in an office the whole day. They can be with anyone they like, be it friends or enemies or lovers... or they can even go home for a good nap. They never taught of producing results. They always have an excuse. Excuses eg. dont know what the customer wants, dont know how to sell, dont know who to sell to, dont know how to handle objections... blah blah blah... How do they know how to overcome all these if they never do sales even though they are SALESMEN!!

Let me clear your doubts. I finally understood some of them. They just want to get paid. Ask them to fill up marketing reports and plan a week ahead, and you know what happen? They RESIGN!! They cant be tied down by it. They are too commited to their relaxed lifestyle. Payday gives them money for enjoyment. They dont want to prove themselves. They dont even know their own strength. They dont know themselves. They dont think about 10 years ahead, what will become of them. Would they have a family of their own? How much would his income be?

A saying goes like this : "If you dont want to be in the same situation five years from now, then first thing to do is change yourself " "You must first change yourself before you can change your situation" . Change your mindset. Set a goal for yourself. How could you change your situation if you dont change yourself?

A speaker once told us a story of her son. Her son is not serious in his studies. He does not care if his results are the best, just so long as he passed. One day, she realised that his results will not be able to get him into any Uni. Not even the local Uni. She thought carefully on how she should handle this situation. One fine day, her son was at home napping in the living room. She brought him the newspaper and woke him up. She talked to him about his results, alerting him of the consequences. Her son simply said "Its still a long way before i finished my studies. Why Worry, Mom?" She had anticipated his reply and prepared her respond for it. She said "Son, i want you to turn the newspaper to the Classified Ads. What positions in there do you see suits your results?" ... He browsed through the managerial post, then the executive post, the supervisory post, ... he didnt looked lower than the management levels.. His mom helped him to find one post which is so "for him"? Its a waiter post in a Hotel. She said "Son, see! I found you a job! You will be able to work in a Hotel. You will get paid serving your friends meals when they go there.. How nice? Now, you go to hotel for meals and drinks, dad and myself are paying for it, next time you dont need to pay to drink in that hotel. You get paid by them for serving customers." .. How about it? Why not apply for it and give it a try? Her son went very quiet. No comments. However, that afternoon was the last time she reminded her son of the importance of studies. He woke up from his fantasy life and was a changed man after that.

I guess the thoughts serving his own friends meals and drinks is not his cup of tea after all...........

MEN!!!

She was feeling depressed and moody of recent. It seems age is catching up to her. Being in her early 40s, she has tried to think positively, she knows she still look OK compared to some of her friends. To start an exercise or even turn exercise into a hobby has been in her mind for years now but she is just too lazy. Excuses such as "oh, just had my hair wash, tomorrow i'll start", "i am so tired, i need a nap, i'll do it when i wake up later", "the weather... its going to rain anytime now (even though she had bought a treadmill can is inside the house)... etc.

Oh well, ... that day for exercise will come..

She's having lunch with her husband at one of their favourite spot. There they always saw that lady there too. Why is it they only notice her and not others you ask yourself? She's chinese ,fair complexion, hair dyed blond in colour, in her early 50s. Her spouse is a indian malay, well to-do but not the good looking type. She caught her husband staring at her as she was walking out of the shop. She felt he was drooling, since they did smiled to each other and he stared at her back from top to heel as she left.

She couldnt get those image out of her mind but she knows well enough to seek clarifications from him now. She wasnt sure how he would respond. Would he be defensive and offensive, would he take it as a joke, or would he just brush the topic aside???.... She knows she has lost the kind of "bond" between both of them of late... maybe they both have changed..

On their way back home, she decide to ask him as tactfully as she knows how.. Well, she wouldnt know his respond till she try, right? she thinks to herself. She chose to ask in a joking manner, teasing him of the way he looks at older women.. Gosh, but that woman has got Style!! .. She may not be a beauty, but she's an eye catcher.. for her Style.

He of course defended and argued gently over it. Saying "nonsense, you're being over sensitive, you're framing me, how could you be so unsure of yourself when you are many times more beautiful than her, younger too ..."

By the end of the conversation, he demaded an apology from her !!! He said she's making him sounds like a dirty old man, accusing him of things he didnt do,... therefore, an apology is essential...

She couldnt believed what she heard!!!!! Of the nerves!!!

OUR GOAL IN LIFE

He is now the founder of a big company , business in food industry. It wasnt easy to start it off initially. He didnt come from a well off family. He didnt had the chance to further his studies like his friends. He wasnt born with a silver spoon.

He sat in his office recalling the earlier days of his career. Those late nights , planning his strategies , managing with the little funds he had saved up through the years of working double shifts, those nights entertaining customers & potential suppliers or those whoever are influential enough to get him link with big shots. He even took up Japanese language classes at nights. He has made many sacrifices , especially his time to himself, money he must save , for he had a dream. In order to achieve his dream, he understands that his sacrifices are necessary and will be worth. He didnt have time for a partner or a pet. His focus is clear. Only one dream only one chance.

He chosed to work in companies relating to the food industry, learning and understanding their work flow. He knows it is utmost important to understand , he is not there to just work for wages only. He worked in different companies, 5 companies at least, in different departments, but all companies are in the food line of business. He saved up 70% of his wages, spending the balance only on his daily needs. He doesnt mind not having a girlfriend, he doesnt have the time for one and of course, how could he affords to have a girlfriend now?

The time has come. He is ready to start his business. He gathered some of his ex colleagues from his previous employment, inviting them to join him. Some of them were to scared to join, some adventurers type jump at the chance. So, he started his company, it was difficult initially. He had to get through this no matter how difficult it may seem because he was so sure this is his destiny. He wanted to turn his dream into a reality. He wanted it so badly. He did not want to fail but he made a promise to himself. He will not stop trying until he succeeds.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
All of us must have a dream. A dream you wanted to turn into reality very badly. Set a goal for yourself. It must be realistic. Focus and work towards your dream , your goal in life.

Dont just dream. You must want it badly enough to work towards it.

Short Story

They started shouting out to her "Your dad's here! Quick! .. Hey! your dad's here! " .. She ran as quickly as she could from the back of the house to the gate. She was jumping with joy, she's going home. She's been there the whole day playing with her friends. But one whole day of playing for her is quite tiresome, she longed for her home.. she longed to lounge on her sofa back at home, be a couch potato, watching her cartoon shows, one at a time....

They had been playing at the back of the house, climbing trees, watching the fish swim in the very small pond... the grass was not cut. She was not used to this sort of environment. it's quite 'dirty' , she thought to herself.. she yearned to go home, to her cozy contented environment where she felt safe, nothing bad ever happen there,.... oh, how she thought she will be in her safe place in 15 minutes time.. she ran as fast as she could to the gate to greet her dad.

She was about to call out to her dad, she had to abrubtly stop at her tracks. The man standing in front of her was not her dad... what's happen? what's going on? .. she turn to the back, saw her friends running up to her. actually, they were laughing at her. one or two of them even call out to her.. "hey, go on... call him dad!.. that's your dad! ..." and they continue to laugh.. She couldnt understand why her friends had played such a cruel joke on her. She loves her dad. That's not her dad. But the way they joke made her look again at the man , he was smiling to her now. He had a warm smile. A familiar smile. Same smile a dad would give to a daughter or son... She was only 8 years old, how could she feels this? how can a 8 years old feel so confused? yet ................ what's happening inside her mind?